Those clever bastards

So we may have been fairly close to finding another cell phone today.

Look, an innocent book


Or is it...a prison craft shop gift box?


You make the call.


B.

A good day at the prison (certainly not something I expected to ever say)

My last day on shift we responded to a tip about a mobile phone in the high-security housing pod I was working. We pulled the 2 offenders out, locked them in the passive rec yard and proceeded to shakedown their cell. We had pulled all of their property out of their lockers, carefully gone over it, and not really found anything of interest other than a clock-radio that looked like it had been modified.

I was shining my light into one of the little lockers and noticed the rear locker walls looked a little "off". I reached in and pushed a bit and found the back moved some.

"Um, Sarge? All these lockers have solid steel backs, right?"

[Sgt nodded]

"I think we've got something here."

I pushed a little harder against the back of the locker and it gave way/folded to reveal a hidden compartment. Behind the very cleverly designed false backs were a number of goodies/items of contraband, including not one, but 2 mobile phones, a homemade soldering iron, a charging cable, an improvised heating device, and numerous electronic bits/components.

Busted!

I tell you, this may not be the best job in the world, but it certainly does have its moments.


Happy Thanksgiving!
B.

WTF? Thought I wuz done with da puppies?!?!?!?!

Kan I keeps it?

Another tv show obsession

You may wonder why I post these here rather than my blog, well I already posted on mine today and anyway, this show was really really loved by the Beagle and I know if he weren't moping in his little world of woe is me he'd probably write about this.

We DVR any TV show we like because 1) they are usually on when the kid is up and not appropriate for her age and 2) we fast forward through the commercials, they are a huge time waster that we just don't need. There aren't a lot of shows we watch, Pushing Daisies (now canceled damn it), House, Life, and oh there were a few other s I can't remember. Beagle is in charge of the DVR, that's not my game.

This past week we watched an episode of House that we think was by far the best episode they've ever done.
House's Head, Episode 415
You can read about it on the link, or watch it there if you so inclined. I can't watch shows on the computer, not quite right to me. Either way the episode is absolutely freaky, really really awesome turn of events. PLUS you get to see Cuddy do a pole dance strip tease. Oh hell yeah that alone should make you watch it. That woman either had a stand in or has the body of a 16 yr old. Damn her. Her bio doesn't list a spouse or kids so she's obviously hasn't gone through those abuses. B says she's a vegan, so that would make sense. Starve your body and you can look hot! Naw, not for me thanks.

If you like House and feel the need to see the excellent episode watch it! Iz guud.

Introducing Mr. Unemployable

Sheesh, I swear I am having the worst luck and response in my attempts to procure better employment.

It's a little depressing.

Over-qualified for this.
Under-qualified for that.
This one's not hiring.
That one must have people who know X program.
Or MS certifications.
Or will be willing to relocate.
To South Dakota.
Immediately.

Sigh.

B.

Why is all the good shit on HBO?

Don't they know most of us are poor and can barely afford regular cable? No lie, my cable bill is $160 every month and I think I have less channels than everyone else I know. Mind you, I only watch like 5 channels, the rest are garbage. OK at least 2 of those 5 channels that I watch are garbage too but at least it's funny as all get out garbage. Anyone who reads my 'official' blog (not this one I randomly take over) knows I have a think for CMT, oh man so they have some funny shit on there, so that can qualify as garbage. And the only shows I watch on TLC are trash too, ok how many of you don't watch Jon & Kate plus 8? I can't believe how many people I know watch that show. It's like watching them makes me feel better about having just 1 kid and I no longer want another every time I watch...

HBO now, they have some awesome stuff they make 'for HBO only' and we never get to see it until it comes out on DVD, good thing we are patient people. Which one am I complaining about now? "True Blood", it's based on the Sookie Stackhouse novels I've been reading for awhile by Charlaine Harris. I looove those books. I went so far as to build a character based on Sookie for a role playing game. Alright for all you pervs out there who don't know us, that's like Dungeons and Dragons role playing games, get your heads out of the gutter. They have Anna Paquin playing Sookie which I'm not so sure I'm cool with. I like Anna and all but for Sookie? I was picturing someone more...passive? Modest? I dunno if she can pull it off but she's a big name and can sell the show so I'm sure that's why they went with her. I wonder if she read the books. Yeah that's a maybe right?

So anyone out there actually have HBO and watch the series? Or even better read the books too? No? Yeah it's a long shot I'm sure. Oh well once again we'll just have to wait until it comes out on dvd...in what 2015? Well if the show is unsuccessful it'll be sooner than that but if it is successful, which it seems to be, I probably won't like it and they'll have probably warped the story so much I'll detest it. Damn HBO....